Out of Control Coaches

Another day, another story about a youth sports coach/administrator going crazy on a young child for no reason at all and probably driving the child out of the sport forever.  In a June, 4, 2024 article written by Andy Paden entitled “Youth baseball director removed following altercation with child” Mr. Paden writes that “seven-year-old Levi caught the attention of the opposing coach during the game as young Levi’s parents said that Levi was playing in the dirt and got dirt in this eye, causing him to rub his eye.  However, the opposing coach took that (the gesture) as Levi mocking his player, who had just struck out.”  Mr. Paden goes on to write that the coach “approached Levi and began shouting his number and was screaming, face blood-red, blood-curdling scream with a bat in his hand.” This caused young Levi to curl up in a ball on the field and begin crying in fear.  Levi stated that he “made the whole field go quiet and he yelled at him (Levi) for no reason”.  Needless to say, Levi has not gone back play and has no desire to play baseball again; regardless of the fact that this particular coach/administrator has been removed from his positions with the league.

What in the coach in their right mind would yell at a seven-year-old boy so badly that it would cause a child to quit the game and possibly never want to play again? Why are adults so out of control that they are willing to risk everything they have over a silly youth sports game? Now,  I’m not going to try to say that I didn’t coach to win the game as in the words of Herm Edwards, “you play to win the game” but as the adult in the room it was always incumbent on me to ensure that I was 1) teaching the game to my players, 2) helping them grow as players and people and 3) ensure that they signed up for the next season.  Winning, while nice and fun, was always secondary for me, which did lead to many a spirited conservation with some of the parents of the children that I coached but I was not backing down on my beliefs or philosophy.  Too many times youth sports coaches think that they are coaching “little professional’s,” and they treat children like professional coaches treat their players and this leads to problems as children, like little Levi, decide that they no longer want to participate in youth sports.  

In an article written by Michael Huber dated May 28, 2022, entitled “Coaching is Emotional: How did I Lose My Cool on The Field and What Did I Learn from It?” Mr. Huber stated that he lost his cool during a youth baseball game and what he did to rectify the situation.  Basically, Mr. Huber stated that his team was down by 6 runs and a combination of errors, past balls, and a couple of solid hits led to the game getting into the mercy rule territory; however, he further stated that “During the inning, I noticed that the opposing team was running on almost every pitch. They would advance from first to second, second to third, and even take home when possible. I didn’t think much of it early in the inning. However, as we approached a 10-run game, I started to pay closer attention if for no other reason than I was really frustrated for our players.”  So, after the game ended, Mr. Huber and the opposing coach had words and as the opposing coach tried to explain what happened his response was “that was f***ing bulls**t” right in front of all of the kids and he further states that “We were shouting back and forth across the field, debating what just happened. I used foul language. My behavior spiraled out of character. As it ended, I immediately knew what I did was against everything that I stand for as a youth sport advocate.”

Now while in the scheme of things, and room, is happening in both the world and youth sports today letting an “f-bomb” fly probably is not the worst thing that can happen, even if it happened in front of 8th grade boys, but as the “adults” in the room, Mr. Huber realized that what he had done was wrong and set out to correct the situation .  He stated that, according to Magrum & McCullick “Saying or acting in an inappropriate fashion can generate a ‘bad taste’ in young athletes, and negatively impact their sporting experience”  Mr. Huber stated that “while coaches are human and get emotional because they are competitive, want the best for their athletes, and they CARE. These are valid reasons for a coach losing his or her cool. However, they are not excuses. Coaches must hold themselves accountable for poor behavior.”

Mr. Huber stated that he realized that he needed to hold himself accountable for his behavior and his response to this situation was to “apologize unconditionally to my parents, my co-coach, and the other team’s coach.”  He further stated that “In my life, making timely amends is one of my core values despite it requiring more humility than I’m sometimes willing to swallow.”  More importantly he stated that  he needed to “apologize to the young men who were exposed to my poor behavior. I haven’t had the chance to do it just yet, but I expressed this to our team’s parents, and I intend to follow through as soon as possible. I don’t want my players to believe it is okay to react the way that I did. Further, I want them to know that it is okay to humble yourself and take responsibility for a mistake. Our words matter, but our actions are much more powerful.”

In my humble opinion Mr. Huber is a youth sports coach who should be held out as an example of what youth coaches should do/be like.  A youth coach who made a mistake, took responsibility for that mistake and is going to make amends.  This is opposed to the situation with young Levi who has yet to receive an apology from the coach/administrator who embarrassed him, while the league official was removed from the league, the child who he offended is still left wondering why and adult was getting away with abusing a child.